To Mutter To Matter
by Liberty SleepStorm
Summary: Natalia wonders about Jade, looks for Jade, and arrives in time to see Jade on the edge of life.


**To Mutter To Matter**

**By EverCrimson**

Summary: Natalia wonders about Jade, looks for Jade, and arrives in time to see Jade on the edge of life.

The joke called the forest, Natalia thought, and she could just hear Asch reminding her that is was her choice to be there. He'd continue on to say she was doing this for the salvation of Auldrant, and as a princess equipped with the knowledge and skill of combat, she was capable of making her contribution. It was her duty, Asch pressed. Those sharp eyes would narrow at her next, and although he'd look daunting, she always saw the encouragement behind it.

Some other time Asch would snort and ask how different it was from Baticul's sturdy palace, or how much she truly miss being pampered, just for the sake of teasing her. It would get on her nerve, truth be told, but she would simply roll her shoulders back, walk straight, and meditate on the untold fact that he only wanted her to be strong…or to stop whining altogether. One time, she gave in to the temptation to say, 'why should you ask? When we were children, you were the one who wouldn't eat an apple if it wasn't polished in the duke's manor.' He grunted and replied, 'Memories fade, and it wasn't as though I had a choice but to eat commoner's apples in order to survive; I was kidnapped, remember?'

After that backfire, she stopped flinching whenever they had to set camp in another filthy place, especially when Asch was around.

Tonight, however, he was _not_ around, and she was eternally grateful because the wince crawling up her throat just had to escape.

"We'd be mud monsters when we wake up!" said Anise, stealing her foot from the ground's clutches. "Yes! I retrieved it whole!"

Guy laughed as he stomped around their things and to the center where he dropped several wood branches and twigs. "Better we shout our names upon waking; we might mistake one of our own as a monster and end up injuring each other more. Hey, Luke, after that, can you look around for more twigs? Anything dry. Leaves would do at this case."

"Give me a break," Luke slapped his right hand on his face and cried, "Damn it hurts!"

"Now who's fault is that, huh?" Tear finished casting the spell, and the fonons stitched Luke's gash together.

"It's Anise's!"

"Hey, why me?"

"Who else has been controlling Tokunaga? Nice doll by the way – very heavy, especially when it lands on your face and you end up sandwiched in-between a dead liger and your teammate." He glanced at his wound, frowned, and sighed.

Anise threw her chin up in the air and folded her arms against her chest. "I wouldn't have fallen on you if Natalia wasn't aiming for me!"

"I wasn't aiming at you." She said, "I was aiming at the little green monster on your head with really sharp claws." She arched her eyebrow at Guy's direction. "And those nasty things wouldn't have fallen from the canopy if Guy hadn't cut the tree where they nested."

Guy gawked at them, forgetting about the dying flames of the bonfire completely. "It was the only way I could defend Tear while she was healing Luke! Did you see that flying cat? I swear it was a feline with wings that was flying towards Tear with every intent of grabbing her, and so I slashed the tree and it fell on the monster, and Luke was successfully healed." He shrugged and turned to Luke.

Luke glowered the other way. "It's not my fault. Anise sat on me. My face, to be precise."

"Natalia tried to kill me!"

"I was saving your head!"

"Well, I saved Tear while she saved Luke."

"It's not important!" Tear bellowed, silencing the rest of the party. She put her hand on her temple and scanned their camp. "What our real problem is this place. Can't we scout for more stable ground?"

"I doubt that," said Guy, "The rain poured really hard after our last battle, and the canopy is too thick to let any sunlight through to the forest floor. We should pray it doesn't rain again, or the dawn will not be too misty, else we wake up subdued in quicksand."

Anise stuck her tongue out. "Yuck."

"Should we try sleeping on a tree?" said Luke.

"Yeah, maybe you can do that. After all, don't you have the instincts of a monkey?"

"Anise, stop teasing Luke."

"I loathe this stinking forest!"

Natalia sat on the bush she had pulled to her own, private area and laid down her weapons. "You know, guys, we really shouldn't be complaining."

All heads turned towards her. She stared back at them. "What?"

"Natalia, in case you're hallucinating, this isn't the palace." Luke leaned forward to her, making his face visible through the dim, orange glow of the bonfire. "This is the Fo-rest! You. Hate. The. Forest. Remember?"

"Ugh." Anise shrieked, "I'm hearing things." she crouched by the small fire, making Guy creep to the other side of the circle, "Hey, has anyone seen the colonel?"

Natalia forgot all angry remarks that was rolling and filing in her tongue at the mention of the missing colonel. Jade had excused himself soon after they decided this lifeless mud-hole would be the perfect camping area for the night. She had stared at him, asked him with her eyes, but he only shook his head and asked if he could borrow her scarf. Although bewildered, she lent it to him without question and watched him leave.

Uneasiness settled in her stomach, so bad that she scowled and said, "I'll look for him."

"Really?" Anise sounded surprised.

Natalia had enough of that little brat's mockery. "Yes, of course, why not? Won't you point out that I am the one wearing boots, after all?"

Out of camp, she vaguely heard Guy scold Anise, telling her it wasn't nice to expect a princess to be so comfortable out of proper civilization like they were, and that she was doing her best and fairing well.

She smiled despite herself. Guy Cecil was always ready to defend her, whether she expected it from him or not. So often, she had caught him looking or smiling at her in the midst of compromising situations and otherwise. He was there…just there, to remind her quietly that trust and friendship was nearby, and while not in her niche, she was still home.

Natalia shook her head, letting the blush on her cheeks subside. She wished Asch was more like Guy in that manner.

With a sigh of defeat, she jumped out of the thick vegetation and landed on the edge of a cliff. Before she could even scream, before she could even realize where she was, gravity was pulling her down, deep into the water.

Her eyes darted open. She shut her mouth. The water was cold and dark, and strong. It felt like gelatin swallowing her, swaying her from side to side in its stomach until she was dizzy. In the middle of that digestion, however, a foreign entity scooped her arm up and pulled her out.

Air seeped and spilled into her lungs. She gasped and panted, waiting for her eyes to adjust to the gloom about. There was a hand on her wrist, and another on the small of her back. Warmth was all she could process.

Her breathing slowed, calmed, and woke her. In front of her face was an expanse of flesh, pale and clean. She jerked away and yelped.

"I am scary, aren't I?" he chuckled, letting go of her wrist. "What a delight it is, knowing a necromancer can frighten even the Kimlascan Princess. I thought you should be more composed than that, Natalia."

She inched her eyes from his chest, to his neck, to his face. "Jade? What-?" Turning, she saw the cliff where she fell from a mile behind, and the turbulence of water below it. She stood on higher ground with slower current a mile or two from where she was subdued. "How…? Did you save me?"

"A water element spell." He said, "It's my turn to ask: are you committing suicide?"

"Suicide? Of course not! I was l-looking for y-y-you!" She hugged herself. Her teeth chattered.

The smugness on Jade's face sank, and he watched her wordlessly.

Natalia shivered more once she realized that those crimson eyes, which, for once, weren't behind lenses, were looking directly at her. "W-what?"

"Why are you staring at me?"

"Y-you're st-staring at me!"

"I'm staring because you're staring."

Blood rose to her cheeks and forehead and she realized that, indeed, she was staring… at his bare chest. "W-w-why are you naked in a-a r-river this c-cold?"

Jade looked down at himself. "I'm not naked. I'm shirtless."

"I asked why!"

"Do you bathe with your clothes on?" he shrugged. "Have I neglected to read a Kimlascan law that states every man and woman to bathe in Kimlascan rives should be fully clothed at all times?"

"There's no s-such law!" She bit her bottom lip and glanced behind him. Shore. She stomped her feet past him, not minding her lack of grace as she trudged forward, and climbed the prairie uphill where his uniform was. Her body sighed from comfort at the humidity roaming about. Soon, she would be dry.

Hefting herself to her elbows, she saw Jade dip into the water.

She waited. She waited.

Natalia sat up, screwing her eyebrows. "Jade?"

The water was still.

"Jade! Jade!" She pulled off her boots and was halfway down the uphill when Jade's head popped out of the surface of the water and he swam towards her.

She gripped her boot, wanting to smack his head with it. "What is your problem? Are _you_ committing suicide?"

He climbed the uphill and collapsed beside her.

"Jade? Are you listening? Jade, what's wrong?"

He shook his head, smirking. "The river abounds with a small amount of seventh fonons. When the fonstones fell on Auldrant, some of them ignited and created specks of dust that concentrated on land…but mostly on bodies of water."

She tossed him his uniform. "How would you know which is which?"

"It reacts to fonons of the same type." He muttered, turning his head to her. "It reacted to a strong spell I cast earlier, which required a lot of the sixth fonons. And when you jumped in, the water grew dense due to the amount of seventh fonons in your body. Didn't you notice?"

Oh. So that was why the pressure was abnormal. "What are you doing here then, Jade? I'm sure you weren't simply interested to take a swim."

He chuckled. "Why not? You all take me too seriously. I, too, was once your age, and I liked the oceans and the rivers and the lakes. They're not snow. They're penetrable. Livable."

"What's that?"

"It's nothing."

"Dear Yulia! You're bleeding!"

He laughed. "You make it a big deal, Natalia."

She transferred to his other side and studied the gash. It was the one he received from shielding her earlier in battle. Those claws aimed to cut her chest were now three, deep, slices along his ribs. She snapped her head up at him. "You said you weren't hit! You said that was the wolf's blood!"

"A large amount of it were." He lifted his torso up, but Natalia pushed him down.

"You said you were okay, Jade! You said-!"

"I know what I said!" he burst.

Natalia swallowed, bowed her head, and put her hands above his wound. Beside this river, healing became faster, less tiring, and more effective. Two minutes or so later, there was a new set of pink flesh above his previously torn ones. The blood dried on his abdomen. Natalia slouched.

"I'm sorry I raised my voice on you, Natalia."

She shook her bloodied gloves off. "I'm sorry _you_ could've _died_ because of _me_."

Jade sat up. She did not bother help him.

"You would've ran out of seventh fonons if I insisted on you healing this and the same goes with Tear." He said. "And this river was nearby. I was healing just fine, for your information."

"In the water, you were healing, and it would have taken two days of soaking before the bleeding stopped." She clicked her tongue and squeezed her gloves in the water. "For someone so clever, you weren't able to figure that one out!"

"I was fine."

"You could have died, Jade!"

"And what is it to you if I died?" he said.

Natalia stopped, gazed at the red oozing from her gloves and swimming with the current, and thought of his question. "You could have died because of _me_."

"Oh!" Jade clapped his hands. "The princess scolded and accused me because she was afraid if I died, the guilt would fall on her!"

She spun to face him, smiling. "Yes, colonel, my concern was all because I don't like feeling responsible for the death of someone I don't even like! Or the idea that an arrogant, old, scientist who used to toy with the bodies of his dead comrades to perfect the system of replication, which, as I faultlessly recall, destroyed the life of my fiancé, would die on my behalf!"

For the first time, in all the bad times they had shared while travelling to save Auldrant, Jade had no single word to defend his pride, and no ounce of shame to hide the hurt unraveling on his face. He took a deep breath, slipped his arms on the sleeves of his jacket, and buttoned it down.

With difficulty, he got to his feet, and motioned for her to follow. "This is the way back to camp." He mumbled.

Natalia put her hand on her mouth, unable to bear it as he limped to an opening in the vegetation ahead.

"Jade," she said.

He soldiered on.

"Jade!" she said. He stopped, back still turned.

"Jade, what were you expecting me to say?"

The wind blew past them. The wind continued to blow.

His shoulders shuddered, and she was uncertain if he was laughing or crying. "A half-delirious, half-mad hope that if I died, I would be remembered as a human being."

"That somebody would care?"

"Maybe."

Natalia knew. Asch had this fear written all over him: to be remembered when dead, to be considered while alive. She expected him to share these thoughts with a lot of people, Jade being the last of them.

"Let's go." He said.

Back in the camp, supper had all ready started. Liger flesh adorned with onions, mushrooms, and tomato juice. Luke asked where they were, and why they took so long. Jade answered for them, saying he was looking for a precious gem rumored to have been dropped by the Black Wings in one of their pursuits, and once he found it in the river, they lost their way back. All of them demanded to see this gem, to which he pulled out a rock from his pocket and narrated a long story about how the ancient people believed that if they waited long enough, rocks would weather and transform into diamonds. At this, even Anise quit on nagging.

Natalia supported his story with a nonchalant wave of her hand, and filled her mouth with food for the rest of the discussion.

Jade sat across from her while they ate. Not once, she noticed, did he lift his eyes to look at her.

"Natalia," Anise nudged her with her elbow, "If the colonel was looking for the gem, why are _you_ also drenched?"

She flushed at the memory of him pulling her from the water, and the fact that she stared at him shamelessly. "Well, the mouth of the river has strong turbulence, and I tripped and got caught in it. Jade used a spell to save me."

Luke grinned. "I should have been there to see that."

"I'm a good swimmer."

"It was a good thing the colonel was there," Tear said, "Or else you could have drowned. No matter how good a swimmer you are, some currents may be too strong for you to take alone."

Jade, too, was staring at her in the river, she remembered. There was something in that moment between them, alone in the middle of cold water, silent and simply staring, that only struck her now.

"Yes," Natalia said, nodding. She dared look at Jade across the fire. "Thank you, colonel. You saved my life."

He smiled, sadly, but did not say anything.

"You okay, Jade?" Guy passed him his share of lemon juice. "You're acting strangely…well, strange."

He sighed audibly, a hand on his chest. "Oh, you know, Guy, there are times when age catches up to you too quickly for your liking. One day you'd be running into monsters and fighting alongside younger men, and realize that your grey hair is falling and you can't swing your arms without popping a bone."

That ended the discussion quick. Tear took the first watch, followed by Luke per usual, then Anise, then Guy, then Natalia, then Jade. She repeated this in her head grudgingly. She would have to wake Jade up herself.

She lay on the ground, her arm tucked under her head, eyes closed, but mind fully awake, thinking of him. When she heard his voice nearby, she thought he had driven her mad or had affected her brain by the spell he cast in the river.

A soft touch on her finger jolted her eyes open, and there was her scarf in her hand, and Jade crouched beside her. The fire was out, and Anise stood watch a long way from them.

He smiled. "Thank you for lending that. It was helpful."

Natalia opened her mouth to ask why he borrowed it in the first place, but said instead, "Did it really help?"

"In its unique way, yes."

"I'm glad."

"Goodnight, Natalia."

She lay her head down again. "And Jade…I do believe that rocks weather and transform into diamonds. Most people are just not patient enough and some…well, they see the diamond before it turns into one."

"Yes," he said, "I think so too."

"But all of them are equally significant, even if majority remembers him only as a rock." She closed her eyes. "Because if he dies as he is, he should know someone has seen the diamond beforehand...I'm sorry for insulting you earlier. It wasn't you who wished to harm me or Asch or Luke."

"I was still wrong to have created fomicry."

"It's good you were wrong for once." she said, "Mistakes prove you're human."

"It's safe to say you will remember that humanity for the rest of your life, yes?"

Natalia smiled, nodding, slowly drifting to sleep. "Maybe it's a jade instead of a diamond that rocks best morph into?"

Author's Note: Thank you for reading! Really satisfied with how this idea materialized! Good day and God Bless!


End file.
